Tonight's Post: Random Babblings of a Madwoman!

Day 20

Down another .5!

Ok, this time during my off days, I went off, let me tell you! Now I feel dirty, like those who walk the "walk of shame." Not that I would know what that is like. (And I will let you decide if I'm joking!) back to my off days--I lost a half a pound yesterday, but after tonight's "pig-fest" with my godson. I say that not beating myself up because I conciously made the decision, knowing that the results will probably not be favorable. I just wanted to splurge, and want to see the results, so if I'm tempted during an Ignite cycle, I will have something to refer back to talk. In my head this made sense earlier. (I guess I should let you know that I was out of Paxil last night, so there were probably other things I said and did today that made sense, but won't tomorrow. Note to self, don't run out of Paxil.)

All kidding about Paxil aside, I can say that after eating so clean and healthy for over two weeks, I did feel a little off today after eating some refined carbs yesterday. I felt a bit sluggish. And I CRAVED my shakes! I'm ready to get back on the Ignite cycle. I know it is important to take a day or two off between cycles, but those shakes are so damn good! And the chocolate "fro yo" I had tonight was not as nearly as yummy as the shakes with cocoa and crushed ice. 

So tomorrow it's back to Day 1 of my Ignite cycles. A LEAN shake for each meal, and two protein snacks, and I'm looking forward to it. I went shopping at Earthfare the other day--I wish I had a Whole Foods or something closer, but Earthfare on Mondays will do. Anyway, it was fun to shop there for healthy things. I bought several soy products (including two types of edamame), so it's obvious that I will be exploring soy in the upcoming days. 

I'm also excited because my mom and two of my sisters will be on day 4 tomorrow. It is fun to be on this journey together. Kind of like a "girls club" kind of thing. I am happy to report that all three of them have lost at least three pounds in their first three days. You go, guys! I'm so proud! They're also using the Xyngular products and my mom is in love! They aren't quite as public as I am, but I'll update you periodically, until they tell me to quit.

Thanks for reading and supporting me on this journey. I'm having a blast--even if I haven't set any goals yet. . . . 

A Little Meltdown

Day 15

Down 16.6 pounds!

I had a minute of insanity this morning--"Not even a pound?!" I yelled, my voice echoing through the apartment causing Sebastian to hide under the bed. "I shouldn't have eaten those sun flower seeds!" "Back to only water in LEAN shakes!" "I hate eating days; I'm never eating bread again!" "I can't do anything right... ."

Wow, what a tirade ending with some negative self-talk. There goes 6 years of therapy, gosh.... I took a few minutes to think on the way to work, and remembered: 16.6 pounds in 14 days. What other diet, program, eating plan has ever given me (and so many others) such results? Calm down, Debb. I remembered that in my research into Xyngular and the products, I read that some people are more sensitive to carbs, even complex carbs and may even gain a little on eating days. I calmed myself down--a little.

Enter divine intervention. So many co-workers commented on how I look like I've lost some weight. Even students commented on how I look different and nice. A couple asked about Xyngular, and a couple offered support and advice to keep me going. It's what I needed. 

So tomorrow is an eating day, I've carefully measured out my pasta--my complex carb for tomorrow--and have already packed my snacks.

And tonight I'm beginning to work on an aspect that I've been week on--getting plenty of good sleep. A step toward that is finishing the blog post before 11:00.

Thanks for reading and asking questions! I love it!   

BTW--Best supper so far!

Kicking Off Ignite Cycle 2

Day 12

Well, I'm back for round 2, cycle 2 of Ignite. Was it hard? Naaahhhhh... .I actually looked forward to it. Over the weekend, I lost almost 2 pounds, bringing my total to 13.5 in 12 days. Bring on the new week!

Because of my size, I've always not planned what I would eat. Somewhere in the deep crags of my psyche I rationalized, "People expect a fat person to think about food all the time." So I didn't plan meals, pack lunches, etc. to fight that stereotype that I only perceived people having.

Well, ladies and gentlemen, I've been doing nothing but thinking of food. And I don't feel bad about it. I had fun today cooking chicken for my protein snacks this week. I've got a head of cauliflower in the fridge, and I'm trying to decide whether to make some garlic mashed cauliflower for dinner, or use it to make a pizza crust--or if I have enough for both. It's fun. Yay!

I've been so excited to use the Xyngular products that I have taken the time to set goals. My Xyngular back office on my site, gives me resources to set short and long-term goals, so my goal (a-ha) is to work on them and go for broke by blogging them Tuesday night. That way my thousands...uh, hundreds...uh, tens of readers can cheer me on and kick my butt when needed!

If you want to learn more about this Xyngular stuff that I am ecstatic about, check out my website. (Do you know how long I've wanted to say that? My website! I feel like a grown up.) Debb's Xyngular Site

It's 10:30 on a Sunday night, and I am not dreading going to work tomorrow. TGIFX--Thank goodness I found Xyng! My life has changed!

Good Friends and Arkansas Pie

Day 10

My mom told me that my great-grandfather used to call gravy over bread "Arkansas pie." When I was growing up, my family called it "gravy bread." (We were usually more creative with names, but wanted to be sure there was no mistaking what we were talking about.) Even into adulthood, don't give me mashed potatoes or rice, just give me a piece of bread slathered with gravy--my mouth is truly watering as I write this. I, however, carried it beyond gravy. When my mom would make steak or chops, I loved loved LOVED to use a piece of bread to mop up the drippings. We called it "soppy." I think I loved soppy bread even more than gravy bread. It was rich, usually a bit salty, meaty, and sooooo bad for me. 

Tonight I went to dinner with my friend, Julie, and her kids. Julie is also on the Xyngular plan (and has had amazing results).  We ended up at a wing place and were pleasantly surprised to find grilled veggies on the sides list. Although I am on my second day off, like I said in my last post, I neither needed nor desired to eat anything "crazy." I wanted to be smart.  I ordered a mushroom burger with some Swiss cheese and veggies. Julie, because of where she is in her Ignite cycle, knew she was going to not eat the bun. I decided I wouldn't either. Do you know how much more you can taste the hamburger when it's not surrounded by the huge sesame seed bun? I'm digressing; I'll move on.

Anyway, supper progressed. It was tasty. The kids were crazy. Despite lackluster service, everything was great. Until--cue dramatic music--I looked down. There, on the bun, lying on the plate, looking at me was the bun, splattered with the juices from the burger. (See, the first paragraph did have a purpose.) For someone who loves bread as much as I, turning down the bun should've been hard, but it wasn't--initially. Once I saw the juices on the bun, well, even though the burger was gone, I wanted to eat it. I, instead, pecked at it, pinching at the spots bathed in the juice. But I did it subtlety, or so I thought, because I did not want the kids announcing it and making me feel guilty about it. (That's a conversation for my therapist, I'm sure.) Julie, at one point, giggled and asked if I had taken a bite out of it. She was not judging me or even making fun of me. We had a laugh, and I asked if I could put the bun one her plate, away from me. We finished our dinner.

See, it was not a big deal. I could've eaten the bun; it was an off day. I could've eaten the bun, even if it wasn't an off day; it would have just slowed my progress some. It would not have been devastating, no big deal. Why I've held you in rapt attention with this story is simple: there will always be temptations, whether it be chocolate, a plate of pasta, or "soppy bread" (or bun). It is a lot easier to stick to the plan--no matter what yours is--when surrounded by good friends!

Thank you, Julie, Drew, Libby, and Sydney for a great evening!

For the Love of Tacos--Day 5

Happy New Year! 

Technically this post is for 12-31-2012; I'm just a night owl, and this is when I like to write. Making myself write more is one of the purposes of this blog, so if you see poems in the near future, don't be too frightened!

Down to business. Halfway through cycle one, after 4 days, I've lost 9 pounds. NINE! It's unbelievable, and I question the scale, which has been acting wonky, but I got the same weight three times, so I'm going with it!

Almost had a meltdown today. As I said before, I never feel deprived or hungry. I didn't even have a hard time turning away my sister and brother-in-law's birthday cake with that really good icing. Then came today, my last day with my family. Day Five is an eating day. I had some yummy pasta again--which I probably will on most eating days until I learn how to make quinoa--lots of veggies, and my protein for lunch. In the past, on my last day at home my mom makes tacos. They are not fancy. They're probably not overly authentic. (She uses Old El Paso.) But something about the way my mama cooks the meat, cuts the veggies, I don't know what else, sprinkles in love maybe, makes her tacos the best thing in the world to me! 

I told mom I'd be able to eat the meat and veggies--not the shells, cheese, or sour cream--and it was fine for me at 1:00. But come 5:00, it was another story. The thought of not having cheese or shells made me a little bit sad, but no sour cream?!?! For those of you that do not know me well, sour cream has been almost its own food group for me in the past. The thought of having a taco without any of that rich, creamy goodness drove me to the cliff. Then I thought--no shell??? My mind went to a little negative place for a minute. I even texted my friend, Heath, to make sure I could not have shells. I knew better than to bring up the sour cream. He assured me that I could not, told me to take a Xyng, drink my water, and smile. Foiled!

I wish I could say that I sucked it up, ate meat and veggies while everyone else munched on those crispy corn shells piled high with the same meat and veggies I was eating plus a slathering of sour cream topped with cheese. Sadly, I can't. I did not cheat, however. For this, you may shout, "YAY!" My mom, with a late in the game save (tried to come up with a witty sport metaphor), changed the menu! Thanks mom! She is being so super supportive! I'd like to give her one of those Burger King crowns to wear! What's more, my dad didn't even complain. She's a miracle worker!

I write all this because a.) it was a little comical, and b.) to show you that it's not all a cake walk. It's sad to give up some of my favorites, especially when I am sure that, for some reason, those tacos have become a comfort food for me. Tonight may have been an ecellent chance for me to do some personal growth, but Mama realized that Ive been working and growing a lot lately, and she swooped in and rescued me a bit. We all need someone to be our support. (I'll be yours, if you need me to!)

When I stop and think, I realize the rewards of sticking with the plan are going to be so much bigger than this small sacrifice. Also, I realize that I am thankful for those two days in between each eight day cycle when I can eat what I want, sensibly. And  it's just two days away. Now I'm not going to go insane, but I have my niece's birthday party on Saturday. It will be my second off day. I might just stop by my mother's for a hug, some support, and a taco.

Happy New Year!